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Gratitude, Intetnions, Bliss

Charity • 13 September 2023

Gratitude, Intetnions, Bliss

A few years ago I started a morning ritual of stating gratitude, desires and intentions daily. Since adopting this daily routine, I’ve found a profound sense of empowerment and control over my life and my future. I am in control of my life and my future. I have several things every day I am grateful for. I am grateful to be free. I am free to speak my truth. Foremost among the things I’m grateful for is my beautiful family, especially my wonderful daughters, who truly are exceptional. It warms my heart to hear praises from teachers, doctors, friends and others about them. I feel gratitude for the opportunity to nurture and love them with both knowledge and compassion.


My trip to London was, in the most simplest of words, blissful. I met so many like minded angels and formed the connections and partnerships I desired. I’m so grateful to everyone who held space for me, worked with me, and helped to heal me from blocks I have been fighting for many years. I felt so loved, seen and accepted by all of these beautiful people. And I have to say the diversity I witnessed in this class made my heart smile. People from all over the world came together to learn, connect, and love (agape). 


I feel renewed, refreshed and back to my old self. The younger me; before I shut myself off to the world. I am confident in all I do. I have been doing this work for years and now I know 100% I am meant to bring this work to Oklahoma along with my other training. This is a special time. The world is opening up to holistic and spiritual healing. I have been training for this for years, some would say my whole life. I feel loved, seen, nurtured, held and free. Free to be my truest self. I am officially a certified Tantra Practitioner and Shaman and I’m elated to incorporate my newfound wisdom into my classes and practice.


Intentionality has become a cornerstone of my daily life. As a coach, I prioritize self-care by practicing yoga, immersing myself in the wisdom of influential figures, and spending time with friends who offer valuable insights into the world of business. My days are planned to ensure that I make the most of my time, except when I’m onvacation, where spontaneity is most important. I am committed to taking care of my mental health and ensuring I get the sleep I need to operate at my best. I started with just one intentional act a day, understanding the importance of setting achievable goals.


As a result of these practices, I’ve developed a more positive outlook on life and my place in it. I’ve gained confidence in my role as a therapist and coach, to the point where I’ve welcomed other practitioners into my company. I’ve even expanded my horizons to explore aspects of play and sexual exploration that were once mere fantasies.


How do you incorporate intentionality into your daily routine? What rituals or practices do you do with intention?

“If brains could have orgasms, I'm pretty sure this was what it would feel like.”

- Cora Carmack, Losing It

17 March 2026
The last two weeks have been a deep unraveling for me. I’ve been letting go of the fear that I’m “manipulating people on a sales call” or “causing harm.” It wasn’t easy. I was flooded with conflicting thoughts. But here’s what I realized: I don’t need to say or do anything manipulative, salesy, or coercive. At all. My issue with sales calls is simple: People are taught to use scripts, “transformational coaching language,” and “unconscious belief” tactics to pressure people into buying programs they’re not ready for. I refuse to do that. What I’ve seen is this: When someone is truly ready for spiritual, erotic, or somatic growth work, they don’t push back on my fee. They don’t need convincing. They eagerly pay to learn the skills I teach. And in the last two weeks? I sold four intensives I was invited to speak at a retreat I didn’t use a single manipulative tactic All I did was: Answer their questions Validate their struggle and their desires Tell them how I could help Assume they were going to buy Ask, “How many hours do you want, and when?” Two intensives were 12 hours each. One was 2 hours. One was 4 hours. No pressure. No scripts. No shame. Just alignment. This is what happens when I work the way I’m meant to work. I’m in true alignment with my values and my clients. I’m attracting people who are ready to invest in themselves without being pushed. I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I’m relaxed. I’m in flow.  And I’m going to keep showing up in my authentic way — because it works.
17 March 2026
About five years ago, I looked around and saw everyone shouting the same thing: Make more money. Make more money. UGH. Yes, we all want money — but is that really the true desire?  That year, without even realizing it, I made $180,000. I was seeing an average of 35 clients a week, with 40–45 on the books. People late-canceled, no-showed, and I was exhausted. I wasn’t happy. I didn’t feel successful. I didn’t even know I’d made that much money until I did my taxes the next year. I was grasping at what I thought I valued: money and success. But those aren’t my values at all. My real values? Freedom. Authenticity. Generosity. Love and connection. Being of service. Empowering others. So I decided maybe I wanted to “work smarter, not harder.” I hired my first business coach. Turns out… she had a one-size-fits-all approach. It was a major waste of money. But I did learn something important: what doesn’t work for me. I often get clarity from the unaligned suggestions people give me. That contrast is useful. I also learned that most business coaches and social media experts have no idea how to market my work. I’m the one telling them what keywords to use. They make big promises and don’t follow through. How many times have I heard, “I’ll personally help you build your funnels,” only to receive templates for chiropractors and medspas? Umm… what? And funnels? I have yet to see one actually work for my kind of work. What I’ve learned over the last five years I don’t want to work with large groups. It drains me. My classes will never be more than 10 people in person, and online I cap at 20. I want to offer individual care, not mass-produced transformation. My desire for freedom, authenticity, and grace shapes how I work and who I attract. I entered a greedy stage for a while — and it blocked me. Generosity is one of my core values. If I’m charging more than I’d pay for my own care, I’m out of alignment. I value a personal approach. I value meeting people where they are and gently helping them move beyond their resistance. I don’t need to manipulate anyone into buying my programs. My ideal clients are ready. They’re eager. They want to expand from desire and possibility, not fear and pressure. I’m not solving problems for people — I’m empowering them to find pleasure, confidence, and self-advocacy. I teach people to have a relationship with sensation and pleasure. To love themselves. To speak their desires in ways that invite connection. My ultimate desire is for my clients to feel as good in their bodies and about their sexual expression as I do. There’s no monetary value you can place on that. People tell me I’ll never be rich. That my revenue will always be limited. They say it like it’s an insult — like I’m a silly woman. I disagree. I am rich in life and love. I am rich in my lack of internalized shame and regret. And that is worth more than any funnel.
by Charity Danker 28 March 2024
As a relationship therapist and coach, I often encounter stories from both men and women who feel victimized by their partners. While some cases involve genuine harm, many examples revolve around self-imposed sacrifices—acts made without the other person even requesting them. I frequently hear about unspoken truths and unexpressed desires. Women often use the word “sacrifice”, claiming they’ve given up so much for their partners. However, when asked whether their partner explicitly requested these sacrifices, they usually admit that no such request was made. In reality, their partners didn’t deny their desires; the women denied themselves. They chose to: Reduce contact with friends to prioritize family time. Forego careers or education due to perceived limitations. Avoid playing favorite songs because of their partner’s preferences. Why do we interpret someone's dislike of our choices as a mandate to change our entire lives? Some women inadvertently limit themselves based on others' preferences and then blame those others. Here’s the truth; no one forces you to change–you made that choice. As mothers, we must indeed need to be loving, attentive, nurturing, and supportive. However, this does not mean sacrificing our individuality. Our music, clothing, and entertainment preferences are a part of who we are. Let’s reject the notion that being a good parent requires suppressing our truest selves.
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